I think “What is skanking? I saw that phrase a lot”

So my one vice is kayaking by myself! Fucking divorce me just because I blow up an inflatable kayak, take it out to the lake once a week, and fantasize about every waitress I’ve ever encountered in my life? Cancel me just because a team of divers found my wedding ring and a couple used condoms at the bottom of the Pacific? I think that would be “cheating on” me.

Sorry for my absence! I was trying to be nice to my grandkids but those Hacks wouldn’t have any of it

Eddie Murphy’s work in the film Trading Places should of been nominated for an Oscar! He embodies the character!

Back in my day we didn’t even have a coochie book but we made do!

The Democratic Party lemmings think nothing of tearing my red hat of my hat and spitting on me, damaging my car because I have a MAGA sticker

Just been reading all your “Feral Hogs” posts! Love them! Funniest meme ever on this website! Laughing so hard!

🙄Oh it’s National Girlfriend Day?🙄

🖕FUCK my ex 🖕

🤡But not literally!🤡


My ex wife’s soup was like a Miles Davis album! (Read between the lines :)

I wrote this toot for a girl.

I say fuck you to my ex wife
But we don’t literally have sex
Damn it feels like a past life
And it wasn’t the best!
You know I’ve got these rhymes
But if only I, could have the time
Back I wasted...
Or at least give me back the money from our expensive engagement!

I don’t understand these words people are using to describe me. CIS? HET? LOSER? ASSHOLE? What do these things mean...

“Yippie Kay-Yay, Mother F$@&?r!”
-John McClane

Hot Girl Summer is causing global warming 🥵

1. Never legally marry an American woman
2. Never have children with an American woman
3. If you are married to an American woman, never buy a house so she cannot steal it from you in divorce!

@RealAlexJones Please Re-Toot! The Message This Country Needs To Hear Right Now!

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the deep state

ok, this is epic